Thursday, March 13, 2008


So... this morning, still being a little heartbroken about no response from the MOH, I sent her a text. Which is really the only way she responds so this is what I sent:

Me: To be honest... I am a little disheartened that we have not been able to connect. I want you to know I was so worried on Sunday, I called XYZ hospital and they said no one had been there all day or was there currently by your name. I don't care about the reason you didn't come, I just want to let you know, I am worried about you and I am always here if you need me.

Now, keep in my mind, I thought... if she did lie, this would give her an out. She tends to stress about things like, "oh no, I didn't show, now she hates me, I am too embarrassed. I could never talk with her again." So I thought, by sending this message, it would convey, I certainly don't hate her and I didn't care that she didn't come, I was concerned.

Her: Take care of yourself.

I am sorry... WHAT??? That is what you have to say? I get the brush off. Holy shit... am I missing something here? Did I miss silent girl code I was un-aware of? I thought I was being nice, and now THIS??

Any advice... I mean really? What the hey! Did I do something wrong?


Ashley D said...

It sounds to me like she is really embarrassed about what she did. The way she responded to your text was rude and I think you definitely deserve some type of explanation on her part.

I would give her some time and maybe try one more time to see if she wants to be friends (If you still want to work things out).

Nanette said...

That's a very strange response indeed. I don't know if she was saying, "Worry about yourself instead of me" or trying to brush you off. Either way, very bizarre.

Larissa said...

Um, yeah. That's a strange response. I agree with Ashley - give some time, and then make another effort to initiate with her.

Sarah said...

Wow how frustrating! Well just take solace in knowing that you did all that you could. The ball is really in her court. You just have to move on for now until she figures some stuff out.

Michelle & the City said...

definitely a weird response. think she knows about your blog and read that post?

Andrea said...

Ashely D: Yeah, maybe your right. I guess I will give it some time, but I truly feel like i got the brush off?

Nannette: My sentiment exactly!

Larissa: We will see, only time will tell?

Sarah: Yeah, I guess you're right.

Michelle: I don't think so, b/c she doesn't have internet, but I don't believe I was mean, I was just simply saying what i was thinking?

Michelle said...

I say cut your losses. It seems like she isn't into making sure she didn't hurt your feelings. Life is too short to stress over people like that. Just my opinion. XOXO

Laura said...

Honestly? This is kind of harsh but I think she IS giving you the brush-off. I think your instincts are correct. I can only guess that the reason would be that maybe she feels like she has nothing in common with you anymore, because I can't imagine why she would want to ditch a friendship with someone who seems so warm and genuine! But after all the attempts you've described to reach out to her and this is all she's giving you back in response, I think she's trying to back out of the friendship but doesn't have the guts to just say so. If I were in your shoes, at this point I would stop contacting her and consider the friendship over unless she makes some effort to initiate plans or at least a conversation. If she wants the friendship back, she will come around.

If you really need more closure than that, you could just ask her point blank if she is trying to end the friendship. But I'll caution you that I've had a "friend" like this in past, and every time I would ask her about it, she would act like she had no idea what I was talking about and reassure me that everything was fine... but then would return to the same way of acting. I finally just gave up and she's never contacted me since. Sometimes people just don't have the guts to tell you what the problem is because they don't like confrontation.

Anonymous said...

I agree with what michelle said - cut your losses! It won't be easy (I have a friend that just literally stopped talking to me, going from seeing each other once a week to...not at all, for no reason whatsoever. I wouldn't care so much except for the fact that he still has my CAMERA - asshole. lol)

Anyway, your MOH is strange! She probably was embarrassed that you pretty much called her out, and she didn't even make an effort to make it to your baby shower, so she isn't even a good friend. Cut your losses now and you'll probably be better off!

Sorry hon, I know it sucks, but you deserve better friends than her!!! xoxo

Princesse Ecossaise said...

Hi Andrea, I just arrived at your blog from 20 something bloggers and got totally sucked in! I have to agree, your friend's actions have been really odd! It certainly doesn't sound like she is telling the entire truth and it's like she is trying so hard to avoid you because that way she won't have to answer your questions. Poor you, you must be so confused!

I think if it were me I'd just wait it out and see what happens. You have tried and she won't let you in. Also, you're pregnant and you've enough on your plate!!

(just wondering but do you think she is jealous that you are pregnant and that's why she went out of her way not to come to your baby shower?)

Andrea said...

Michelle: I am with ya!

Laura: I am assuming you're right. I just didn't understand why it was happening to me.

Clueless: I totally feel ya! I am not going to make a move until she does something. I am over trying.

Princesse: Thanks for checking out my blog!! And I DO think she is jealous. She was crazy jealous at the wedding, I guess I should have guessed this would push her out more.

Ashlie said...

I had kindof the same incident happen to me. My best friend of 11 years who was planning my bridal shower called two days before and said she couldn't make it. I was crushed, but I didn't want to make a big deal about it 'cause I didn't want to ruin my shower/wedding with animosity. BIG mistake. I ended up avoiding her for the next two years. We finally just hashed all the issues out.

If its a friendship worth keeping I'd try to settle the issue right away. If not, than I'd let it go. It will only be HER loss....

elysa said...

in my best stephanie from full house voice I saw "how rude" and I think I'd be done with her whether or not she does come back around she has some serious making up to do.

ps - BRADY!!! hello we are waiting haha