So... yesterday I had a breif mommy moment.
You see, having a baby does a lot of things to you. It changes your body, your perception on life, and most of all, it makes you never the center of attention again ;-)
All anyone wants to do is see the baby. Which for me is great. I love for Mr Man to get out there and meet the world. (That is what his shirt says by the way... hee hee!)
The problem being, sometimes, is that life gets in the way of other stuff, like showering, or sleeping.
Today, we have Mr Man's first proffesional photo's and the in-laws wanted a take a couple with us in it as well. So, I planned to pump and actually leave the nest (without my guy) and get my nails done.
Well, mid shower, B woke up and was quite fussy. It seemed to me he had some gas. The problem was, he was focused on the gas, and he was tired, so he started screaming. Like... for 2 hours. It was PAINFUL to watch, not to mention I couldn't help him. I called the Pediatrician and she suggested some stuff, but really it wasn't working.
Now let me tell you, when you are so sleep deprived, your nerves are on edge and you have a fussy baby, it is a true test from God. I didn't know what to do... so... I yelled at hubs. It was horrible and solved nothing, and it actually made me feel worse, but I was just so spent!
Then, after running errands and baby falling asleep in the car, my nerves slowly calmed. I went for my mani/pedi and I actually took a nap and then I realized how horrible it was to yell at someone for no reason.
We are all doing our best here, but I have to tell you, it is a LOT harder than it looks. With pictures here, people making plans there, and the overall chaos of a baby, sometimes life gets in the way.
I shouldn't complain, but I just never realized how taxing it is to your mind and body to cope with this new one.
My saving grace, I must admit, is when I stare into the eyes of Mr Man. He looks at me with those blue eyes, scanning my face, and things just fall back into place. I don't care about photo's or birth announcements, or if my carpet is clean for company. All I care about is that little guy, who grew inside me, and who depends on me now for so much. I want to kiss his chubby cheeks and I want to see him smile.
So my question... did you think raising a baby was easy, or is it just me?
4 comments:
I can't tell you if raising a baby is easy or hard, because I am waiting to start :) but from what I've heard... if someone tells you it is easy they are a LIAR!!
I think you are doing a great job, and you do need time for YOU too- don't forget that :)
I have never had a baby but I think the stress you are under is totally normal and as long as you said sorry I think hubs understands.
Your hormones are running crazy and if you need M to call me to tell him that then have him call me. I cried alot the first few weeks and then slowly it got better and everything kinda fell into place. Your body is trying to recover from being pregnant and move into the correct hormone state that it must be in to produce milk. Give yourself a break and tell M that you are sorry ahead of time, your body and brain are trying to balance out. XOXO
It sure doesn't sound easy! What you are saying about it being totally worth it sounds like what I've heard from everyone. I need to join the mommy club! BTW - can't wait to see his pics, the photographer looks very talented.
Post a Comment