Wednesday, August 8, 2007

Lions, Tigers and RATS... oh my!!!

So yesterday, I am lounging upstairs, and I start hearing this loud clicking noise, somewhere downstairs. I thought Sammy (my crazy cat) had grabbed some plastic and was playing with it (a favorite past time of his!) I look over the railing to see the biggest rat, I have EVER seen, eating out of the dog bowl. I screamed, grabbed mocha, and ran in the office. I called Matt and told him to get his pretty ass home, NOW!! He said he was leaving. As I sit in my office, I realize, something is "meow-ing" outside my door. I open the door, just a crack, and see my cat, Basil, standing outside looking at me like... what the heck is going on? I pull him inside the door and stuff a pillow under the crack of the door. As I wait to hear the garage door open, I attempted to do a crossword online.

My foot was shaking and I don't even think I got one answer on the crossword. I was so nervous that stupid rat was going to start perusing my house, I couldn't contain myself. Finally, I hear Matt and then I hear this loud bang. I crack open the door and scream downstairs... it it dead?!? Matt yells back... not yet. Then, I hear another bang.
I open the door and scream... now??? He replies, "yep!"

As I creep downstairs, still afraid the thing is going to leap and bite me, like I was in a NY City Sewer, I realize there is blood on the kitchen floor. I look at Matt and I'm like, what the hey?? He tells me, he went in the garage, got his pellet gun, from when he was a child, and shot the thing. Now, as I almost hurl in my mouth, I realize that is rat guts, on my beautiful kitchen floor. I seriously could have cried!
I don't think I can ever forgive him for mutilating the disgusting rat all over my floor. Geez, couldn't he have gotten a freaking napkin or grabbed it by its tail or something... UGH!!!
If you girls have any idea how I can explain to my husband, in "man terms", that was the nastiest thing he could have done... I am more than open to suggestion!


elysa said...


I do think though that Matt's brownie points for rushing home counteract the disgusting manner of mutilation.

Andrea said...

good point!! Matt gets huge browning points from saving me from the rat ;P